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Hi Girls!

Girlspiration is your go-to place for encouragement, confidence, true Girl Power stories and important reminders filled with positivity & love. Being a girl isn't easy sometimes and the pressures can be overwhelming. BUT, here's the great news! You are never alone!! When I was cyber-bullied in middle school I felt alone and wished their had been an organization like Girls Above Society. At age 15, I created and founded Girls Above Society and 13 years later, (SO exciting) I'm still on a mission to give every girl the tools and mentorship needed to become confident, kind and cyber-smart. 

Sometimes we just need our voices to be heard along with a gigantic boost to keep going and focus on the good. I'm covering it all here in Girlspiration. Girl Drama, Friendships, Social Media, Pressures, and the list goes on and on. 

Have an idea or want to hear my thoughts on a certain topic? Connect with us! Your idea/story just might be featured! Click on the Girls Above Society logo at the top of this page. It will re-direct you to our home page. You'll find our contact info at the bottom of the page. We're excited to hear from you!

XOXO Lauren

 

What Is FOMO?



FOMO stands for "fear of missing out." This term went viral and was added to the Oxford English Dictionary in 2013. Have you ever had that nervous or anxious feeling when you realize you were not invited to be with friends because you saw the pics on social media? Did this revelation make you feel insecure about how you really fit in with friends? If you answered yes in your head, don't worry because you are not alone!


I don't believe we should rely or consider our self-worth based on popularity but FOMO causes girls to assume that they have a low social ranking. This belief can create anxiety and feelings of inferiority. Did you know FOMO is especially common in people ages 18 to 33? One survey found that about two-thirds of people in this age group admitted to experiencing FOMO regularly. Here's a link to the survey just in case you're up for reading more about FOMO (Australian Psychological Society)


FOMO has become an even bigger issue, especially for young girls who seem to always be online, checking status updates and posts by their friends. I've been there too so I confess to experiencing FOMO. So, when girls miss a get together, do not go on a family vacation one summer, miss out on camps or do not attend the school dance, they can feel a little less cool than those who did and posted fun photos online. Social media is a huge "highlight" reel so remember that even though some girls are always posting "fun" pics doesn't always mean they live a better life or are happier than you are. When you are home feeling bored and scrolling through the social media feeds, it can be difficult to ignore those FOMO feelings.


Fun Fact: Justine Magazine reached out to me back in 2016 and asked my expert advice on FOMO for their holiday edition. As we reach the end of 2021 FOMO is not only hanging on, it's spreading. Good News! There is a cure for this dreaded syndrome....but it's up to US to end it for good. Keep reading!


Farewell FOMO
Justine Magazine Featuring Teen Expert Lauren Galley

HUGE problem! The obsessive worrying about what everyone else is doing only causes girls to miss out on their own lives even more. In fact, FOMO causes girls to keep their attention focused outward instead of inward. Girls begin to lose their sense of identity and struggle with low self-esteem. Struggling with FOMO means we are so focused on what others are doing that we forget to live our own lives. WHAT???? YOU have a life too, so don't forget that!




THE CURE OF FOMO!

Of course, turning off our phones & iPads seems like a natural cure for FOMO. But just switching the phone to "off" or "do not disturb" does not erase the feelings that FOMO causes. The secret is to put away your phone and do something else like read a book, journal, draw, take a walk, bake cookies—anything that allows you to focus on something other than social media. I love taking my dog for a walk and baking and honesty I feel better doing those things than just sitting and scrolling. Those posts aren't going anywhere and neither am I if I keep feeling like my life doesn't measure up to others.


Another remedy is to schedule specific times each day to check social media. I love this idea! My schedule is super busy but during down times it's too easy to start that never ending scrolling, so I find better choices to occupy my down time. I love listening to podcasts and this is a great way to wind down without being on social media. Scheduling social media check-in is awesome because you are not glued to your screens and are living more in-the-moment if you are only checking social media at set times each day rather than scrolling endlessly through Instagram, Tik-Tok etc...Try this!! I promise it helps. Give yourself 2 weeks and I bet this approach becomes a positive habit. There's so much more to life than social media.....yes, there is!




Remember: You cannot be everywhere all the time and the fact that everyone will not include you all the time doesn't mean that you are not worthy or liked. Sometimes those last minute sleepovers or get togethers are just that...last minute. We ALL miss out on fun things. Social media is a huge magnifying glass that can distort REAL life. OK girls, let's start within ourselves & cure FOMO for good!


XOXO Lauren



A journal published in Science (Gender Stereotypes about intellectual ability emerge early and influence children’s interests) reveals


At age 5, children seemed not to differentiate between boys and girls in expectations of “really, really smart”—childhood's version of adult brilliance. But by age 6, girls were prepared to lump more boys into the “really, really smart” category and to steer themselves away from games intended for the “really, really smart.”



The results suggest that children’s ideas about brilliance exhibit rapid changes over the period from ages 5 to 7. At 5, boys and girls associated brilliance with their own gender to a similar extent. Despite this strong tendency to view one’s gender in a positive light, girls aged 6 and 7 were significantly less likely than boys to associate brilliance with their own gender. Thus, it is important to investigate the acquisition of the “brilliance = males” stereotype in early childhood, as children enter school and begin to make choices that shape their future career paths.


Nevertheless, the present results suggest a sobering conclusion: Many children assimilate the idea that brilliance is a male quality at a young age. This stereotype begins to shape children’s interests as soon as it is acquired and is thus likely to narrow the range of careers they will one day contemplate.


Being SMART doesn’t mean you must be the loudest, most popular or talented OR that boys only dominate when it comes to being smart. Smart implies one has the ability to adapt to different conditions and situations swiftly and quickly. Smartness cannot be measured whereas, intelligence can be measured by conducting an IQ test.



Confidence gives girls the courage to try new things, take leadership positions and stand up for themselves amid the pressures of today’s media driven society. These learned skills can contribute towards girls feeling very very smart.





How can girls learn the “smart” skills?


Read like your life depends on it!

Read about something that interests you. Learn something new!

Reading is one of the best traits to learn in life. Knowledge is power!


Try something new.

It’s OK if it doesn’t work out. The key is to keep on trying.


Birds of a Feather Flock Together!

Make good choices in who you hang out with. Learning from others is pretty awesome!


Play Games!

Games that boost your brain!

Scrabble, Chess & Checkers are great choices!


Learn Music or a Foreign Language


Keep Active

AKA - Get off the couch!





NOW IS THE TIME...

to start putting the skills in motion and develop a habit of feeling very very smart! Now is the time to start recognizing examples of other women who are also really, really smart. Now is the time for all girls to recognize the power of self worth and trust in themselves. Reminder: Smart leaders are not easily swayed by peer pressure.


START LEADING!

xo Lauren


Updated: Sep 10, 2021

Are you feeling the “cold shoulder” exclusion from friends you hung out with over the summer? Has a friend attached herself to a new group of girls? You are definitely not alone. Unfortunately this phase happens as we start a new grade or attend a new school. Friendships go through a rollercoaster of change and even thought it’s normal, girls can get through the tough moments but more importantly understand what’s really going on. Here’s my take on this crazy whirlwind of friendships.






I can practically guarantee you that it’s not your fault! The beginning months of a new school year can be exciting. New teachers, new friends and sometimes a brand new school. It’s pretty easy to get caught up in wanting to be liked, accepted and finding yourself in classes with brand new girls you never met before. So, it seems super logical to strike up a conversation and next thing you know, you’re connecting outside school. In the midst of all the new, sometimes we tend to lose sight of the loyal bff’s we confided in all summer.


Between school, after school activities, homework and chores, we lost thoughtful time to check in and be a good friend.




WHAT CAN YOU DO?

Talk it out and share how you’re feeling. This is one way to get answers and stop stressing over “Is she a friend?” or “She hates me.” or “What did I do?” Convos are super effective. You’ll know where you stand and either move on or make the friendship work. It’s that easy. Talking it out also keeps drama from spreading because you’ll want to vent to your other friends about how you feel you're being treated. Nix the drama - It’s wasted time and not worth it!




I have personally felt this way and will admit it stinks, BUT it did give me a great perspective on what friendships truly mean. I learned that I too have to be a good friend and reach out to those that are important to me. Great friendships are never one-sided.

You will have lots of acquaintances but the number of REAL friends you have may be smaller than you think. Do not worry - this is OK! Quality over quantity every time!!

Now, stop worrying. Have those important convos and be a Girl Above Society, aka, a great friend who lifts up her BFF's!




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